The reason that I'm here

I was getting near retirement,

Was time that I slowed down,

So I passed the farm on to the son

And I moved into the town.

For a year or two I went back out

When seeding time came round;

And when the river was in flood

And lots of sheep got drowned.

At harvest time, I drove the truck

From paddocks to the train;

Then back out to the farm I’d go

And do it all again.

But as the years slipped quietly by

I went there less and less,

Enthusiasm stayed away

Lost energy, I guess.

I was getting pretty lazy,

And I was far from fit;

Most days on my verandah,

For hours and hours I’d sit.

And read the daily paper from

The front page to the back;

I’d ponder on the weather map

The footy and the track;

I’d devour the outer pages

And everything inside,

Including the obituaries -

To see if I had died.

Then one day in the local rag

I read a bit that said,

The Naked Poets show was on

At twenty bucks a head.

Well, the thought, it quite intrigued me,

Of poets standing there,

Sprouting out their rhyming words

With all their bodies bare.

So on the night, I went along

To sit and watch the show

And listen to these naked bards

To see how far they’d go.

Well I was disappointed -

Not in the words they spoke;

But cos they left their clothing on,

But it would have been a joke

For none of them were young and slim,

A couple were quite old

And if we’d seen them in the raw

Few tickets would be sold.

But the show was truly magic

I almost peed me pants

At the funny, naughty poetry

With a bit of song and dance

oooooo

How does it finish?  You'll need to buy my booklet to read the 16 remaining verses and find out  

© Brian Langley   17/6/2005

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